Smart, Dark, & Deadly

Christmas Spirit

2009-12-21T15:40:21Z

Why do I do it?

I was at the Target earlier, finishing my Christmas shopping for Bill. I had to go to the lady's room. While I was, uh, sitting there, I heard sniffling a few stalls over. When I came out, so did she, an African-American lady a bit older than me, and she had obviously been crying.

So I asked her if she was okay.

We ended up sitting in the little cantina with some coffee. She talked. I listened. Her son's in the Middle East. She's sad and worried. I promised to pray for him, and for her, too.

I hope she feels better now.

I wonder what comes over me. I KNOW what's going to happen.

Happy Yule, everybody. I'm glad you're all safe and well, and that I know where you are.

Writer's Block: Starting from Scratch

2009-12-17T16:42:28Z

What would it take to get you to start a new life on a new world?

Sponsored by AVATAR. In theaters December 18. Buy tickets now.

View 454 Answers

Oh, that's easy.

What it would take would be a big ole artist's grant from the government, one that would allow me and say, oh, fifty, of my closest friends, to pack up and set up an artist's colony on the planet.

I'd build a huge compound, so everybody would have their own living and working space. Each person, even if they were part of a couple, would have her/his own bedroom, studio, and bathroom. Privacy is essential to good work, as is plentiful hot water and comfy king-sized beds with tons of pillows. The studio would contain whatever one needed, a computer, or a kiln and pottery wheel, good lighting for the painters, a darkroom, etc.

There would be a huge communal lounge and a communal dining room, so we could all get together every night and eat and talk and drink and inspire each other. And a state-of-the-art kitchen, because so many of us love to cook. Three or four sinks, two double ovens, walk-in refrigerators. Lots of counter space, because dinner would be a cooperative affair among several cooks. With huge dishwashers, as so few of us love to clean up.

Of course, we'd need a nice big recreational room, with Xboxes, Wiis, videos, big screen tvs, and lots of La-Z-Boys. A pool table, maybe? We could have movie night, crying at the sad ones, laughing at the funny ones, and throwing popcorn at the awful ones.

Space for a vegetable garden, so we could spend some time out in the air and the sun, and so we would have healthy food to eat. Flower gardens, with gravel paths among the beds and benches in both sun and shade, in order for us to have a place to seek the refreshment of nature and natural beauty. We'd need a nice little pond, for swimming and just because a water feature adds so much to the enjoyment of the outdoors. Skinny dipping would be encouraged.

In order to bring in some money and to provide someone to do the grunt work of living, like laundry and whatever, we would offer one-year apprenticeships in our various fields. In exchange for two days of grunt work a week, they would get three days to work with "their" artist, and two days off. Room and board would be provided, of course.

Every six months a ship would land, dropping off supplies and new apprentices, and taking the fruits of our labor. At least those fruits that require physical transport, like paintings and jewelry.

How perfect would that be?

My Favorite Christmas Carol

2009-12-04T17:33:57Z

In an age when it's fashionable to be cynical...

I heard the bells on Christmas day
Their old familiar carols play,
And wild and sweet the words repeat
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And thought how, as the day had come,
The belfries of all Christendom
Had rolled along the unbroken song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

Till ringing, singing on its way
The world revolved from night to day,
A voice, a chime, a chant sublime
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

Then from each black, accursed mouth
The cannon thundered in the South,
And with the sound the carols drowned
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

It was as if an earthquake rent
The hearth-stones of a continent,
And made forlorn, the households born
Of peace on earth, good will to men.

And in despair I bowed my head
“There is no peace on earth,” I said,
“For hate is strong and mocks the song
Of peace on earth, good will to men.”

Then pealed the bells more loud and deep:
“God is not dead, nor doth He sleep;
The wrong shall fail, the right prevail
With peace on earth, good will to men.”

Get Scared For The Holidays!

2009-11-28T17:09:38Z

Appalachian Winter Hauntings includes eleven bone-chilling accounts-penned by many of the preeminent storytellers in the business-that are appropriate to the Appalachian region and relative to the heart of the holiday season. This anthology, edited by Michael Knost and Mark Justice, is designed for cozying up close to a blazing fireplace on the coldest of winter nights. Contributors include: Ronald Kelly, Brian J. Hatcher, Patricia Hughes, Steve Vernon, S. Clayton Rhodes, Steve Rasnic Tem, Sara J. Larson, Scott Nicholson, J.G. Faherty. EmmaLee Pallai, and Elizabeth Massie. The texture is gritty and the stories are moving. Think Charles Dickens' "A Christmas Carol" turned up a notch with a ghostly Appalachian backdrop. So, pour yourself a mug of hot cocoa, wrap your favorite blanket around you, and brace yourself for ghostly stories and weird encounters that take place in the shadows of snowy hilltops or along icy mountain trails. Family friendly.

ISBN-10: 0982493959
ISBN-13: 978-0982493953

A Chance To Be Charitable!

2009-11-13T17:02:27Z

Please support Mental Health America of Indiana in their battle to overcome the stigma of mental illness and to aid those suffering from all forms of it.

Get a Sneak Preview of our

Holiday Event!

Bidding begins on November 13th at 2pm but you can get a
sneak preview of the items up for bid on our online Holiday Auction.

We have included many items so that you can sit back, relax and do your holiday shopping from your computer this year!
Take a look at our unique items including:

* Children's Gift Baskets

* Gift Certificates

* Art

* Sporting Items

* Unique Collector Items

Click HERE to preview and start your holiday shopping

A Good Read

2009-11-12T16:47:04Z

Everyone should read the essay from Maurice Broaddus that appeared in today's Indianapolis Star
http://www.indystar.com/article/20091112/OPINION01/911120455/1002/OPINION/My+View++Creativity+arises+in+oddest+places

Join Me At The House of Oddities!

2009-11-10T15:50:28Z

Date: Saturday, November 14, 2009

Time: 2:00pm - 4:30pm

The House of Oddities

421 Spring Street
Jeffersonville, IN

Phone: 812-285-1185 812-285-1185

Join local writers, publishers and artists from Indiana and Kentucky for a signing/reading/schmoozing horror-themed event at The House of Oddities!

Guest include:

Maurice Broaddus
Michael West
Kathleen Watness
Sara J. Larson
Jerry Gordon
Michele Lee
Debbie Kuhn
Mari Adkins
and Jason Sizemore of Apex Publications

An Author Dies...

2009-11-02T21:19:38Z

...in a good cause. If you enjoy this story, or any of the other stories for Brian Keene Must Die Day! please consider making a small donation to The Shirley Jackson Awards.

Talismanic Magic

Just another day, at just another convention. Just another fan-boy mob scene. "Hey look!" a fat, pimply kid in a Dawn Of The Dead t-shirt shouted. "It's Brian Keene!"

The mob turned and raced toward a bearded man with glasses who had just stepped out of the elevator.. Their faces shone with the light of the true believers, FUKUS all, aglow with joy at the sight of Him, their adored one. The howling pack surrounded him, waving books, scraps of paper, and even used napkins from the con suite.

"Hey, Brian, will you sign my book?"

"Brian, I'm your friend on Facebook. GhoulGirl? You know?"

"I follow you on Twitter!"

"Sign my book?"

"Sign my paper towel?"

"Sign my underwear?" This last from a buxom brunette in a striped catsuit.

"Well, hey there," the author replied, scrawling his name on the red silk thong.

"Brian, I've read every one of your books!"

"You're my favorite writer, dude! Ghoul changed my life!"

Keene smiled and nodded, like a balding, bespectacled bobblehead. He signed everything they thrust at him, although with every stroke of the pen he felt diminished, as if he was shrinking, shriveling. Like each signature stole a little piece of his soul. But they were his public, his fans - without them, he'd be nothing, nobody. So he grinned, and autographed, and felt lesser by the minute.

As the ink drained out of his Sharpie, the vital force bled out of his essence. With one last, weak scribble, he inscribed his name on yet another paperback copy of The Rising. He was done.

They had what they wanted, all they could get, so the crowd turned away, leaving nothing in the hallway but a tiny, blasted husk. And then the brunette in the catsuit swept that up off the floor.

"Cool" she purred to herself. "I can sell this on E-Bay."

"Hey!" screamed the fat, pimply boy, pointing. "Isn't that Wrath James White? Hey, Wrath!"

Goooo NaNo!

2009-11-01T16:12:21Z

Good writing to all of my friends who are doing NaNo this year! Go words! Type, type, type!

Dark Wishes

2009-10-31T16:38:08Z

Happy Halloween, bogeys and ghouls!

I'll be thinking of you when darkness

falls. Good eating!

My First Professional Sale

2009-10-22T19:42:31Z

My short story "The Nativity Tray" will appear in Appalachian Winter Hauntings from Woodland Press, due out in November.

I'm sort of crazy with joy. :)

Interview With Dr. Elizabeth Miller

2009-10-14T13:10:34Z

Check out my interview with the Bloofer Lady herself, Dracula scholar Dr. Elizabeth Miller.

http://www.horror-web.com/interviews/miller.html

Dracula Week At HorrorWeb!

2009-10-08T15:17:05Z

It's Dracula week at HorrorWeb! Come on over and check out my review of Stoker's original novel. And keep your eyes on us all week as we explore all things to do with the sanguinary count!

http://www.horror-web.com/

Come See Me At The Festival!

2009-10-08T14:50:20Z

I'lll be at the Martinsville Fall Foliage Festival today through Sunday. Food, games, a parade, rides, arts and crafts. Admission is free! www.fallfoliagefestival.org

Come To The Faire!

2009-10-02T23:06:38Z

Anyone who can should come on out to the Fisher's Renaissance Faire. I'll be there, selling jewelry, and Bill will be in his kilt. He has really cute knees. But seriously, I got a sneak peek at the program today while we were setting up, and it is going to be the best one yet. Tons of stuff going on, and the food court is huge. I mean, really huge. Homemade root beer, here I come! Bring on the turkey legs!

http://fishersrenfaire.com/

October Fun at HorrorWeb

2009-10-01T15:31:04Z

Did you think the weirdlings over at HorrorWeb were just going to let the spookiest month pass unheralded? Pshaw! We'll be celebrating Halloween all month long, with all sorts of special goodies, featuring the greatest horror icons of all time. Starting today, a week of Frankenstein. We'll be discussing books, movies, tv, music, you name it! Stop by every day this month and see what's new and what's fun.

Next week - Dracula!

www.horror-web.com

Going Nuts Here

2009-09-30T18:30:06Z

If in the next few weeks I'm hard to reach, or don't reply promptly to an attempt to reach me, I apologize. I'm having to learn to completely rethink the way I manage my time, because I've taken on some new responsibilities and projects, and suddenly, my tidy days have exploded into chaos. I crave your patience.

Pagan Pride Day

2009-09-25T13:23:25Z

I know this seems like all I ever post any more. Sorry.

I'll be at Indy Pagan Pride Day in Broad Ripple Park tomorrow. www.indypaganpride.org from 10-5. Admission is a donation of canned goods. Hope to see you there!

New Reviews

2009-09-18T14:44:51Z

I have a couple new reviews up at HorrorWeb. http://www.horror-web.com/reviews/YaBB.cgi?board=Books Wander over and check them out. I'm SmartNDeadly, which almost goes without saying. ;)

This weekend

2009-09-18T13:36:12Z

Hey local types, I'll be selling jewelry at Spirit Fest at beautiful Camp Chesterfield this Saturday and Sunday. Come out and see me! www.campchesterfield.net

Wait, There's Another One

2009-09-10T16:43:09Z

Forgot I posted this one on Tuesday:

http://www.horror-web.com/reviews/YaBB.cgi?board=Books;action=display;num=1252434637

New review

2009-09-10T16:27:33Z

I have a new review up at HorrorWeb, Gideon Redoak by Anne Fraser:

http://www.horror-web.com/reviews/YaBB.cgi?board=Books;action=display;num=1252598832

Birthday Greetings!

2009-08-26T17:34:36Z

Happy Birthday to hildy ! Have a great day, and a wonderful year. I hope all your birthday wishes come true!

In Context

2009-08-26T13:36:39Z

Hey everybody! I'll be at Context 22 this weekend. If you're going to be there, I'll be in the Dealer's Room selling jewelry and hanging out with my peeps in the Indiana Horror Writers. Also, the IHW is having a room party on Friday night. Great food, great drinks, great company. Hope to see you there!

http://www.contextsf.org/

Birthday Greetings!

2009-07-16T15:11:42Z

Happy Birthday to virtualcleo !